Many of you know my old computer, Athena, died. She didn't quite bite the dust like so many computers do, but after being dropped and me tripping over the power cord and completely mangling it beyond (what I believed to be) repair, I got a new one. I knew that once the battery died, I wouldn't be able to recharge her. She was on her last leg anyways, the hard drive was practically dead.
My mom's husband Kevin wanted to see if he could fix her so he could fiddle around on her. He's never experienced a mac before. So I begrudgingly brought it to him, hoping he would get electrocuted and cease all efforts. I didn't want him to fix it because then I'd feel bad about getting a new computer, even though I knew the hard drive could go at any moment.
He fixed her, and after me spending a good chunk of time deleting all my files, erasing my histories and password keychain files, I handed her over to him.
It's so sad, I can't believe I'm almost crying! I think it has a lot to do with the fact that its midnight and I didn't get a lot of sleep last night. Do you know the HOURS I've spent with Athena these last three years? Probably more than with real people. She came with me practically everywhere and in a lot of ways became part of my identity. Ask anyone who was at Queen's with me: I spent my two years with my laptop in Mac-Corry Caf eating pizza either surfing academic journals or the Resources Wiki.
It actually feels very violating to know that his fingers are on her keyboard. It's not just that it's him, it's that she's my baby in someone elses arms. It feels like all my files are still there for him to see. Technically they still are on the disc until they're re-written, but I know he's not going to try to access them.
It just feels so wrong. I'm going to try and think up an excuse to get her back just so I can have peace of mind.
I know this makes me sound totally insane. But at least I know Angela understands!
and cue "Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)" by Greenday.
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2 comments:
awww...all those times on project that i played that stupid game...with all the heads and how you launch heads at other heads or something? LOL. i just said the word heads a lot in one sentence.
i will miss your lovely computer too. In fact, it was the inspiration to me getting a mac.
HAHAHAHAHA
this is so bizarre. as if he fixed her!!!
i can just picture him sitting there looking at the wonky screen (my handiwork), and having no idea of the memories attached.
i can also picture the look on your face as you handed her over. it's funny but also sad.
anyway, i'm sorry, but still glad you got a new compy!
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