apathy?

the 3 weeks of classes I have left seem like infinity. I have 2 big important essays due next week and 2 tests the week after. In the mean time it's integral that I keep up on my readings and I only have time to keep on top of the readings. This is the life of an arts student. It's so frustrating because I just get so tired and lose all motivation. I have readings to do for my 8:30-11:30 seminar tomorrow, where I'm marked on my participation (I've said one thing all year) and I'm so tired. I can convince myself of anything when I'm tired like this - for example, skipping my class tomorrow seems very, very inviting. I did that last week tho! I'm pretty frustrated with myself. I'm really bad at self-motivating right now. I know I'm going to get through it somehow - at least this weekend is Easter and I'm not going home... so I'll have plenty of time to work on my papers (and celebrate!).

It's just buckling down and doing things, rather than thinking about doing them that is always always always my struggle. Hmm... did anyone else (female) notice something about the 'always' in italics? That's also my problem this week haha. tmi, i know.

In other news, I think I've decided to make my blog less public. There's a feature to make this invite-only, and so I will invite the ppl I know read this. If you don't get an invite, don't take it personally I just probably don't realize you read it. This is mostly because a)that was the whole reason I came back to blogging in the first place as is stated here (warning, really weird picture of me - may cause blindness) and b) I had a dream last night that someone contacted me and told me that their kids were reading my blog and getting mixed signals about something... i don't really remember but he implied he was upset and I was being a bad example! awkward. Anyways, I don't doubt it!