all I can think of are clichés and this is not the time for them

So in driving home from a support appointment today I was thinking about how I get myself in situations I don't know how to deal with. I have plenty of stories of people confessing awful things that they have done or been through or stories that I have experienced with people as they were honest & shared their life with me. But then, like I said, I find myself in situations I have no clue how to deal with or help them through. 

What do you say to a person who tells you they used to cut themselves when they were upset but then switched to watching hard core pornography so that they would feel ashamed?

What do you say to a person who has clearly told you that they have  a plan to kill themselves and explain the plan to you? 

What about when a person admits a sexual abuse so horrible that they actually don't remember the details -- their brain has blocked it out -- but they know it happened?*

Seriously? What do you say!? The crazy thing is, I could probably avoid knowing these things about people. When asking people about themselves I often can tell if they are lying or not telling the whole truth and because I love Truth I usually probe until it comes to the surface. And then I'm left speechless. 

Sometimes I wish I wasn't like this and I respected people's boundaries; if they decide to say they're doing fine when they're not, maybe I should just let them be. But from experience, so many of these people just aren't honest because they don't feel like they have anyone to be honest with -- that people don't care or will be so horrified they'll run off. I admit, I have wanted to run before! 

So on this drive home today I was asking myself: why do I open up the doors for people to pour out their scary scary secrets, when I'm so helpless to do anything. I concluded that even if I don't have the words to say to make it better maybe in being honest they wont feel alone through it all. And maybe, just maybe, they'll be one step closer to healing. 

*none of these things are associated with the person I met with today